Wednesday, June 19, 2013


Bubba, Cooter and Gomer were buddies, did almost everything together ..... mostly hunting and fishing, so when Bubba died in a fire .... Cooter and Gomer were asked to come to the morgue and identify the body. Cooter arrived first and was greeted by the mortician ...... 'Yep', said Cooter .... 'shore looks like Bubba but his face is burned purty bad

, you better turn him over' ...... The mortician did as he was asked and Cooter took a closer look ..... 'Nope' he said .... 'that aint Bubba' and left the room ......... When Gomer arrived, he was shown in to meet with the mortician .... 'Yep' he said, 'same height, same weight .... but just to make sure, you better turn him over' ....... The mortician obliged and Gomer took a closer look ..... 'Nope' he said ..... 'it aint Bubba'.
The mortician said to Gomer .... 'You and Cooter seemed so sure it was your friend until I turned the body over ... what was it that changed your minds ?'

Gomer replied ...... 'The corpse only had one asshole .... Bubba had two ..... everytime you saw Bubba, someone would say "There goes Bubba with the two assholes"'.

Tuesday, June 18, 2013

Alarm clock that shreds money if you don't get up

The inventor Rich Olson has basically combined an alarm with a shredder, so if you don't get up you get fined with that dollar shredded beyond legal use. Of course it is a prototype for now - and in many countries it is illegal to destroy money - but I have a better idea .... combine a shredder with a letter box ........ no more bills ... and no more junk mail.

Tuesday, June 4, 2013

Apache Pizza stand over decision not to deliver to Moyross

DRIVERS AT AN Apache Pizza outlet in Limerick have stopped delivering orders to homes in the Moyross estate as they say it is too dangerous.

Robert Pendleton, director of the pizza-making franchise said the company had to stop delivering to the busy estate as it was too dangerous.

“Every six months to a year we will attempt to deliver to the area,” he said but added that if there is a serious incident, the ban will remain.

Meanwhile in Cork ...... 

a Pizza delivery man was attacked by five masked men last night .... he is recovering in CUH.

Here's what they need ..............