Entire Chelsea team not sent off by mistake

REFEREE Andre Marriner has been criticised for failing to dismiss players despite TV replays showing them wearing Chelsea shirts.

The referee of Saturday’s match against Chelsea allowed John Terry to remain on the pitch in the face of overwhelming evidence that he was, and continues to be, John Terry.


Midfielder Eden Hazard could even be heard remonstrating with the referee, saying “Look at what I’m wearing, I know what I am.”

Always send off the player in blue ............ Just in case

Onlooker Joanna Kramer said: “The crowd was dumbfounded at the sheer idiotic risk of allowing players wearing Chelsea shirts to play a full 90 minutes of football.

“At the very least Samuel Eto’o should have been given a red card, because it was obvious to everyone he needed a good sit-down to catch his breath. And maybe a cup of tea and a Bourbon.”

Andre Marriner said: “Improbable as it seems, there’s actually nothing in the FA’s rules prohibiting a club from being Chelsea.

“Obviously high-level discussions are in progress to rectify that, and by next season we hope to have technology in place that will detect and nullify Chelsea players before they even reach the pitch.”

Arsene Wenger said: “If only league titles were awarded on the basis of moral superiority.

“Still, at least they didn’t shame the whole of English football by playing Ashley Cole.”